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Drinking Poison Meant For Others: How to Forgive When You Really Don't Want To

Writer: Jasmine CharchunJasmine Charchun

Let's all be honest...we have all been wronged one way or another. We pour our trust, passion, heart and hope into a bottle and pass it along to the people in our lives to steward. At times the bottle can be broken, scratched and tossed aside by the people in our lives in a way that hurts. This is an experience that all adults go through and the pain can run deep. So deep that we may try to seek revenge so they may suffer the way we have. Unfortunately, instead of hurting those that have wronged us we end up poisoning ourselves.


This poison settles into our spirit as hate, fear, despair, vengeance and many other emotions that can lead to destruction. We can't control the way that our fellow human handles our bottle; however, we have the opportunity to respond to its mishandling that moves us forward. Instead of ingesting the poison, we can give the gift of forgiveness to ourselves and move into a place of learning.




"One forgives to the degree that one loves."

Francois de La Rochefoucauld




1. Feel the Emotions

You will be sad, emotional and plain pissed that your bottle was mishandled. These types of emotions are legitimate and need to be acknowledge in way that provides release. Feel the emotions and run towards the discomfort that arises from facing your emotions. For example, drinking a barrel of vodka while eating cookie dough ice cream will numb for a time but the emotions will come roaring back. 'Sit' in your emotions long enough to begin and support the healing process. This can include mediation, deep breathing, therapy, life coaching or even beating a pillow with your fists...feel this out my friend!


2. Learning By Thriving

Human beings are imperfect beings-people are happening all over the place! Take a look at the local news and you will see all the greatness and evil that humans can create. We have an opportunity to use our experiences, even the hard ones, to move ourselves forward by experiencing forgiveness. That means forgiving those that has harmed you for YOUR benefit and learning.


A few questions you may ask yourself are...

- What did I learn from this difficult experience?

- How can I take this experience to move myself forward in a positive way?

- Who might benefit from me learning from this experience?


Give yourself the gift of forgiveness and see the amazing opportunities that arise.


All with Love.

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